The long lost art of making anything interesting appear boring.


A sort of late bonfire night poem which also explores why I hated school so much !

The teacher held up a bright tube of cardboard,
“Do you know what this is class he said?”
The students answered,”Sir that’s easy,
It’s a firework of course, we’re not brain-dead!”
“Incorrect pupils I hold up a chemical machine,
Full of chemical binders and agents that oxidize.
You will learn to appreciate this before it’s lit,
So you understand the chemical reaction inside.”
“Boring,” the classroom all grumbled,
“Why can’t we take the firework outside?
Then set it off, stand back and watch
As it lights up the whole of the sky.”
“Be quiet class,” said the teacher, ”and note,
The oxidising agents that help the firework burn.
Some agents are more volatile than others,
Now wasn’t that a fun fact to learn?
Examine the reducing agents, the next fun part,
They burn the oxygen to produce hot gas.
The finer the powder the faster the reaction.
Another amazing firework fact!
So now your lesson is over,
Go out, but remember my words.
So next time you see a firework,
You will appreciate what you’ve just learned.”
But after the lesson had ended,
A student distracted the teacher by the board.
While the others stole the firework,
And stuck it in the teacher’s car exhaust.
“Enjoy the complex chemical machine sir,”
The kids joked. “As you go home tonight,
Enjoy your fancy binders and oxidisers,
As you drive home with your car all alight!”

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One thought on “The long lost art of making anything interesting appear boring.

  1. Pingback: A lazy Monday « Skaggy the Poet

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