Blowing the dust off some of my old poems I found these lurking in the archives, if my memory serves me correctly they were written for a poetry book and some or maybe one was published but I can’t remember which !
There was an old woman who lived in a shoe – the modern version.
There was an old women who lived in a shoe,
She had so many children, she didn’t know what to do.
So for all the fathers she went and sort,
And made them all pay child support.
Humpty Dumpty – the modern version.
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
Humpty Dumpty sued the owners,
And won himself a nice cash bonus.
Little Miss Muffett – the modern version.
Little Miss Muffett,
Sat on a Tuffett,
Eating her takeaway.
Along came a killjoy spider,
And sat down beside her,
” Do you know how much calories and saturated fat is in that tray?”
Jack and Jill – the modern version.
Jack and Jill went up the hill,
But soon forgot about the water.
As Jack turned on all his charms,
And now Jill’s got a daughter.